why I can't pursue my passion

(an endless list of excuses really)

There are plenty of real obstacles preventing us from pursuing our passions (lack of time, lack of money), but some of the biggest roadblocks aren’t standing in our path so much as filling up our heads. These hurdles are mental.

And, by and large, they are not true. They are lies.

Lies that sound just true enough that we have no problem believing them. The power they have over us is real. And they keep us stuck.

I asked this question on Facebook years ago: When it comes to chasing your dreams, what lies have you long believed about yourself?

I got a whole lot of answers. Here are just a few of them:

I can’t make a living doing my passion.

People will look down on me.

I’ll fail.

I'm boring.

I don't have anything to offer.

It's too late for me.

I’m not smart enough.

I don’t deserve any better.

I’m too busy with daily life.

I don’t have the time or money to figure out my passion.

The unknown is too scary.

I’m not as talented as others.

I don’t have anything unique to offer.

Chasing my dreams is selfish.

My family won’t like it.

I’ll disappoint myself and others.

Let me just address four (of many) that resonate with me personally.

People will look down on me. Friends, I wrote a book called what makes you fart? I’m a 49-year-old woman who would like to be taken seriously, and I wrote a book about farts. What will people think?

New motto: Who the hell cares?

I can’t make a living doing my passion. Me neither (at least not right now). Right now, in 2025, to support myself and my family, I’m editing and ghostwriting for other people. My dream is to make a good living off my own writing. I don’t know how long that will take—or if it will ever happen.

But I’m determined and committed.

I’ll fail. I was born with the fear of failure. Typical Type A/oldest child/Enneagram 1. I. Hate. To. Fail. More often than not, I just avoid anything I might potentially suck at. Only recently have I intentionally done things that scare me. And things I know I won’t be good at right away.

Turns out those are the kinds of things that inspire people. And they’re almost never as scary as I think they’re going to be.

It’s too late for me. A lot of people told me they felt like they were too old to pursue their dreams. “That ship has sailed,” one friend said. Okay, well, sure, there are a few boats that won’t ever be coming back to your harbor. Like, if you’re 49 and you dream of being an Olympic gymnast but you’ve never learned to do so much as a cartwheel.

But most dreams are still doable. Like becoming unexpectedly single at 44 and dreaming of writing books for a living. Hell, you could even take gymnastics classes at 60. The Olympics aren’t everything.

Age can be an asset. Age means you’re experienced. And honestly? Sometimes you can’t make great art without living a whole lot of life first. (Exhibit A: the ridiculous-ass marriage book I wrote when I was 30)

My great-grandpa was working as a substitute teacher (and had two girlfriends who didn’t know about each other) when he was 91 (NINETY-ONE) years old, so I think we’re gonna be okay, you and me.

SO TELL ME: What excuses have you been making when it comes to following your passion? What lies have you believed (or told yourself)?

Now: are you ready to let those go?

(today’s post is an excerpt from what makes you FART? If you need a signed copy—and why wouldn’t you??—let me know!)